mjalti:

I’m living my best life but like. in my head

aluminumapples:

light-em-up-benzedrine:

vampireapologist:

college professor just said “you’re probably too young to even remember this” and brought up something that happened in 2011

Better than my professer that said we’d “probably recognize this from Saturday morning cartoons” then showed us a cartoon from 1935…

New immortal vs. old immortal

astraldeterminism:

if you wake up much earlier than normal you feel secret emotions

thebootydiaries:

private messaging friends: lmaO so anryrywya im fuckgng crygn

private messaging someone for the first time: Hello, nice to finally talk to you! It’s wonderful that we have the chance to communicate through this messaging service - anyway, enough of me blathering on like a fool, how are you?

tchaikovskaya:

tchaikovskaya:

im extremely nosy but i dont have loose lips and thats the best combination tbh im not here to spread rumors or hurt anyone im only in it for the knowledge of everyone’s business i wont tell anybody but i NEED to possess ALL of the secrets

me hearing all the different sides of the story because everyone involved has told me directly what their take on the situation is but not saying anything and just watching it unfold like a intensely dramatically ironic shakespearean play with an audience of one (1) which is ME 

big-perk:

hallucin8:

funny but 🙃🙃🙃